cixx.com
Episode 4: Mr. Jones and Mr. Evil Collide
By Cixx Admin Date Posted.. 2009-12-03 17:53:51
Views (120)

 Approximately 4 weeks later:

Linda:   Mr. Evil will see you now Mr. Jones.

Jones:   Thank you Linda.

Evil:   Come in Jones - and pull the door closed after you.

Jones:   Yes sir, Mr. Evil

Closes Door

Evil:   Have a seat Jones.

Jones:   Yes, thank you.

Evil:   Jones, I just don't know what to make of you. I have done everything in my power to build you up and to provide you with a real career opportunity - and this is how you repay me - - by joining the Union?

Jones:   Perhaps I can explain…

Evil:   I'm not finished Jones! This is a personal affront to me and to this fine organization. With this latest action you have shown exactly what you think of the effort and expense that has been invested in you by this institution. You know Jones, in my day there was such a thing as loyalty.

Jones:   With all due respect sir, doesn't that loyalty have to run both ways?

Evil:   Jones, I don't know what you're talking about. I have been fiercely loyal to you. I have provided you unmerited promotional opportunities and protected you in the face of disparaging remarks from other executives.

Jones:   You mean there are other executives who know who I am?

Evil:   Oh yes, Jones. You can rest assured that this little incident has captured the attention of a number of our key executives.

Jones:  What are they saying about me?

Evil:   Frankly, the rest of the senior management team has lost all confidence in you. To a man they think you're not worth your salt. And looking at you right now Jones, I can hardly disagree with them. I've got to be honest with you Jones, right now, I am your only friend.

Jones:   My only friend?

Evil:   Yes Jones - your only friend! You have humiliated yourself and jeopardized your standing with this company. Now, what do you say that we put all this nonsense about joining the Union behind us and start fresh? I think I may still be able to convince the team to keep you on the payroll -- on a probationary basis, of course.

Jones:   Mr. Evil, I really appreciate you for standing up for me like that, but I have made my decision. I feel that I owe it to myself to give the Union a try.

Evil:   Jones, you are pathetic - running off to the Union like a scared rabbit. I can tell you right now, you won't be able to hide behind the Union for very long.

Jones:   That is a chance I am prepared to take sir.

Evil:   O.K. Jones, I can see that you have thrown down the gauntlet. Well, let this be remembered as the beginning of the end for you. Just watch and see how quickly I disarm you and that band of outlaws you're running with. You will unravel like a ball of string on a high-flying kite. Life is about to become very difficult for you Jones. You will regret the day you ever came into this office.

Jones:   I think I already do.

Evil:   What was that Jones? You're mumbling again!

Jones:   I said I guess I should be going.

Evil:   Jones, if you walk out that door as a member of the Union you will not walk back in as long as I am Chairman of this company.

Jones:   Yes sir, I understand.

Jones Exits

  Other related Articles from : Humor
 Here are the winning entries from a contest for some of the most promising new scientific theories.THE RUNNERS-UP:4th Runner-up -- The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, th ... more
Number of views (137)
 Several Days Later. Detective Westfield:   Well Jones, I think you can feel quite proud of yourself. The arrest made the front page of the New York Tribune. Jones:   What's going to happen to M ... more
Number of views (123)
 Think about these haunting similarities...Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters.Both w ... more
Number of views (130)
 1. Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger." 2. Two boll weevils grew up in SC. One went ... more
Number of views (155)
 Linda:   Mr. Evil, here is a letter from Jones' attorney asking you to immediately remit a check for $1.2 million dollars payable to Mr. Jones. Evil:   On what grounds? That is the most preposterous thing I have ... more
Number of views (150)
 Anally.........................Occurring AnnuallyAntibody....................Against Everyone.Artery.........................The study of paintings.Bacteria......................Back door to cafeteria.Bandages...................The Rolling StonesBarium.......................What doctors do when ... more
Number of views (147)
 Following an extended trip to the Carribean.  Letter to Harvard Law School Admissions: To Whom It May Concern: Please find attached the completed ... more
Number of views (130)
 Let's face it - - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neigher is apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French Fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.We ... more
Number of views (139)
 Episode 1: Mr. Jones Gets a Job At the Job Interview: Jones:   Good morning Mr. Evil, I appreciate your taking the time to interview me this morning. I am very excited about the job opportunity. ... more
Number of views (127)
 3 weeks later About 2:00 a.m. in the Executive File Room. Harry:   Now remember Jonesey, we're looking for anything that looks the least bit suspicious. Jones:   It's a lit ... more
Number of views (147)
© 2009 Cixx.com - All Rights Reserved .
Design & Developed by : Mechtechnologies